Reading another widow's blog, I have realized what I have been trying to put into words yet could not so eloquently find the words in my soul to put it all together.
http://widowsvoice-sslf.blogspot.com/2012/05/language-of-grief.html
She went spiraling into the world of widowhood a week before I made my grand entrance onto the red carpet.
The essence, it's emotionally dividing to talk about grief and joy in the same life. You struggle to not want to disgrace and water down the love and joy you had. Everything is tainted by the glasses of death and loss yet you have a drive to live, to love, to have joy and fulfillment...connection. And, truly our loved ones on the other side want that.
By the way, SSLF (Soaring Spirits Loss Foundation), the source through which this particular blog was posted, is absolutely fantastic!!
http://www.sslf.org/
I didn't do much more than blog stalk this site at first...but eventually I emailed a few widows, commented on their blogs, asked them questions.
And I felt normal.
It's a great venue for finding help, finding insight and finding resources. If you know a widow...send this link along!! After Chris died, I found out there are wonderful resources for widows...if you are older or military. The only community I found of younger widows...stay at home moms, moms with younger kids was online.
Last night I watched a news story about a club for tall people... everyone should have a place where they can define themselves by something other than the thing which seems to overwhelmingly define them.
Widowhood is my badge. It's my journey. It's my story.
